Vacation in Macedonia felt SOOO good!!! Yet here we are, back to real life. We spend another couple of days together with my family and then my dearest boyfriend packed up ALL of his stuff and left for Germany ... So this is it, I'm on my own again, trying to figure out where will I head to next.
I felt guilty for days about going on vacation when I have all these unfinished businesses at home, oh yes, I did! It nearly tore me appart to see my closest friend pack and leave, knowing he's not coming back - for years. Then slowly, things started moving around me so I made a step forward and moved on along with them. In that moment the guilt was gone, I did gain even more than I expected from macedonian time, I got the will to finish school back. Now that's a good start, isn't it?
I felt guilty for days about going on vacation when I have all these unfinished businesses at home, oh yes, I did! It nearly tore me appart to see my closest friend pack and leave, knowing he's not coming back - for years. Then slowly, things started moving around me so I made a step forward and moved on along with them. In that moment the guilt was gone, I did gain even more than I expected from macedonian time, I got the will to finish school back. Now that's a good start, isn't it?
On the other hand, I'm becoming more and more attracted by the idea of writing my final papers in Germany - just don't tell that to my parents yet, ok? ;) Anyway, I highly doubt that I could gather enough courage to get all my stuff together and leave to another country in search of a better opportunities. Temporarily, I don't have issues with that. Take ALL of my things and LEAVE for indefinite period, no, I don't have the guts for that. Yet ...
Is it better to invest more in your intellect and then let yourself be pushed around by more experienced and intellegent adults who haven't moved there behinds from on sit to another in decades? Or just get this basic dregree and then work in whatever you get a chance to really develop and prove yourself in, that is take whatever you get and built your way up with work instead of school?
Is it better to invest more in your intellect and then let yourself be pushed around by more experienced and intellegent adults who haven't moved there behinds from on sit to another in decades? Or just get this basic dregree and then work in whatever you get a chance to really develop and prove yourself in, that is take whatever you get and built your way up with work instead of school?
Stay somewhere you know exactly how things move and don't like that way at all or start from scratch somewhere new where there might be better just as well as they might turn out to be far worse?
Thanks god I'm just a twenties girl and don't need to know answers to that. Soon enough I'll learn what I am to know.
Thanks god I'm just a twenties girl and don't need to know answers to that. Soon enough I'll learn what I am to know.
In any case, we're all just students of life. Nobody really knows life - even less understands it. Fact.
No comments:
Post a Comment